A Day in the Life of the Batfamily
by robinbatmanlover
Summary: Mostly what its like for the Batfamily(mostly Robins) in daily life.
1. Cake

**Batfamily game night pt. 1**

Monday night.

Bruce: Okay we have yatzee, uno, or some game with cirlcles.

Tim: Neither

Dick: We always play those games.

Damian: I say we play castle, he takes out an axe.

Dick: Where the hell did you get that?!

Damian: League of Assinas.

Bruce: Didn't I tell you not to get toys from there?

Dick: Toys? Thats an axe! A re-

Bruce: I'm aware of what it is Richard!

Damian chases Tim around with his axe.

Tim: Stop arguing anf get this phsioco away from me!

Damian: I'm not a phisco Drake!, he hissed still chasing Tim.

Bruce let out a sigh: Damian we need Tim to throw at the bad guys as a distraction if we ever get cornered.

Dick: Bruce!

Tim: Nice to know ware I stand in your heart dad, he said the last word sarcastically.

Bruce: Tim sometimes you need to be selfless and take one for the team.

Dick: Its okay Tim we'll just hang with Connor and his _awesome_ dad.

Bruce:Traitor!

Dick: Talk to the hand pops, he and Tim then lefe for the Kent's.

Thus this is just a normal Monday game night in the Wayne household.

**Because I'm Batman!**

Dick: Bruce why won't you let us take a picture of you smiling?

Bruce: Because I'm Batamn!

Dick rolls his eyes

Dick: No, Damian. You can't bring in another stray cat.

Damian: Yes I can.

Dick: What makes you think so?

Damian: Because I'm Batman.

**Batman vs. Robin**

Bruce: I never thought it would come to this.

Dick: Neither did I.

Bruce: It didn't have to be this way.

Dick: You know it did Bruce! You know it did!

Bruce: Perhaps...but it ends right here! Right now!

Jason eating the last cookie: Oh grow up.

Bruce: You monster!

Dick: How could you!

Jason rolls his eyes and walks away.


	2. Pie

**Hi sorry if there was any misspellings on the last one. I was really tired when I wrote it and just wanted to write down my ideas before they left my head. Please enjoy!**

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**Death of Another** **pt 1**

Dick had just woken up but he already had the distinct feeling something horrible was going to happen today. It was the same horrible feeling in the bottom of his stomach he felt when he heard the Joker had kidnapped Jason. But no this time there was no news it was just a feeling. Almost like a premonition. He had left Gothem after getting into a horrible fight with Bruce. Now he was living in London with his newest girlfriend Gina Brock.

The original boy wonder went into the bathroom. He did the usual shower, shave, and went to the bathroom routine. He went back into his and Gina's bedroom to get dressed. He put on jeans and a black v-neck t-shirt. Then went to the mini kitchen and poured himself pre made coffee Gina had made him before she left for her job. He put in the microwave and warmed it up. When it was done he turned on the world news and sipped his coffee.

He went white when he heard the headlines. " In Gothem City Robin, Batman's beloved side kick was killed when the city was under attack. ", announced some reporter," He will be well mourned threw out the city."

He barley herd the last sentence. It just wasn't possible. Damian. Damian had died. It just wasn't possible. He couldn't, wouldn't believe it. He called Bruce. Surely his adoptive dad would prove the news report wrong. He dialed the number. It rang a few times before some picked it up. "What?" came the harsh distant reply.

Dick nearly choked. Bruce had only sounded like that one other time, Jason's death.

" I heard." he said. It sounded so foreign. So sad and angry compared to his usual chirpy self.

Both lines were silent for some moment before he heard Bruce again.

" I could have stopped it. I could have saved him." Bruce said quietly.

Dick was still quite. Bruce's own voice barley got to him.

" Your right. You could have. So where were you this time? Off fooling around with Salina."

He could feel Bruce's line go very tense. Then Bruce said something. Dick couldn't comprehend because he still couldn't believe it. Even when the tears stinged his eyes he couldn't. He couldn't believe he would never again here his youngest brother's laughter when Dick tickled him. Or how he would never again get to hug Damian. It was all so unreal. He snapped back into the real world when he heard the bullet go off on the other line.

" Bruce? Bruce!"

Dick went even whiter if it was even possible. He could barley breath when he relised he had killed his father. He should have known Bruce was in a very unstable state right now. And to have said those horrible things… Dick was such an idiot. No, worse he had broken his father's number one moral to never kill.

**Dick**

Tim: Hi Dick.

Dick: Hello Timmy!

Dick hugs his younger brother before Tim goes up stairs into his room.

Jason: Hey Dick.

Dick: Hey Jase!

He high fives the second Robin.

Damian: Hello….dick.

Dick: He- bad Damian! Don't say bad words!

Dick then hears Jason's laughter from the hallway.

A few minutes later Alfred brought Jason a frozen steak for his swelling black eye.

**Sentimentak Attachments**

Dick sleeps with a robin his parents gave to him.

Jason sleeps with brown teddy bare Bruce gave him the first week he was adopted.

Tim has a bunny his mom gave him for his birthday when he turned one.

Damian has a fluffy dark gray kitty cat stuffty.

As you can see all of Batman's sons each have a sentimental attachment to something , though how Damian got a cat stuffty is a mystery.

**Death of Another pt.2**

Dick hung up finally and wiped the tears from his face. He went out to get some fresh air. The cold London air hit him as soon as he went outside. He stared to walk down the street. He went to the nearest bar. It was strange. He never thought once in his life he'd be drinking let alone at a bar. He had always refused to drink any sort of alcoholic beverage.

He sat down in the bar an ordered a simple beer. He didn't know how long he was there or how much he drank, but he sure as hell was drunk. He got back to his and Gina's apartment. What he found there only added to his horrible nightmare, Deathstroke standing above Gina's bloody body.

" Gina!", he raced to her side but Deathstroke punched him away.

" You you killed her!", Dick was fuming. He was completely controlled by rage…and it scared him.

"Come on Nightwing", came Slade's normal calm voice. It felt like such a taunt at times. " Can you say you _really_ loved her."

Dick stood there paralyzed. Of course he loved Gina. So couldn't he say it? How come the words wouldn't leave his lips?

Deathstroke chuckled," I thought so."

" What do you mean?", Dick growled. He was close to just punching Slade.

" Exactly what it sounds like _Nightwing_", Slade said Nightwing in a way that made Dick cringe.

Slade moved away from something that made Dick lose it. Barbra was ling there still. Her face white and blueish purple bruises around her neck. He punched the villain square in the jaw. Slade laughed tauntingly only it was the last straw. He swore Batman he'd never kill anyone after he confronted Zoco all those years back. He suddenly had a gun in his hand. When had he-it didn't matter he could avenge his girlfriend and dear friend.

" Dick!", His name echoed from all around him. Who said that?

" Bruce? But-"

Dick woke up in the Batcave on one of the three hospital beds they had there. Damian was looking over him. Bruce was holding his hand, and Jason was sitting on the Batmobile.

" What the hell happened?", he asked weakly.

" You were given a high dose of fear gas.", Bruce said in his normal Batmany way.

" Oh.", was really all he could say.

"Get some rest Master Dick. It truly is a miracle your alive.", Alfred said giving Dick some pills and water.

Dick swallowed down the pills as Alfred shooed everyone out so Dick could get some proper rest. Dick sank his head down on the pillow once again. He was tense, afraid to go sleep to possible nightmares.

" Its alright you know.", Jason had hopped off his seat on the Batmobile and was walking tord the bed Dick was in.

" What's with you?"

" Shut up.", Jason sat down beside him and held his hand," Now go to sleep will you. A-and don't get any ideas!"

" Whatever you say Jace.", Dick teased as he closed his eyes peacefully drifting off to sleep.

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**Well hope you liked it. Also I'm naming my chapters out of dessert for completely random reasons. And I'll be posting chapters randomly but I'll try to get one on at least once a week. **


	3. Donuts

**Ok so thanks to 5-STAR for your comment. I'm very glad you liked the ending to chapter two. Also are people reading this or just cliking on and off because well I have no clue. So I guess please review so I know pleople are reading this story and I'm not just wasting my time typing. And please enjoy the story!**

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**School Days**

Damian entered the building with Dick. Bruce was in Star City working on a case as Batman. Jason had told him the many horrors of this place called _school_. So Damian already knew you were forced to talk to low live happy weirdo kids. That you couldn't beat the snot out of people, and cats weren't allowed! How could cute sweet kitties not be allowed?

Dick walked him in to Damian's 3rd grade class. The teacher, Miss. Everlou, had greeted them. Then Dick said to be good and kissed his forehead then left him there all alone. Damian swore in his mind then went to a dark corner to be alone.

" Damian, please take a seat on the carpet with the other kids for story time." Miss. Everlou said.

" Don't talk to me or I _will_ kill you," Damian threatened as he glared up at his rather ugly teacher.

Miss. Everlou was a thin frail woman who was about 72 years of age. She was the nicest and meanest teacher at Gothem Privet Elementary School. She had her gray hair tied neatly in a tight bun and wore a bright pink dress.

Damian already despised her, and Miss. Everlou in all her life never had a kid make such a threat. So it was no surprise when Miss. Everlou looked at Damian with shock.

" Get on the carpet. Now!" she said through clenched teeth.

" Do you have a death sentence?" Damian growled.

" Young Mister", She said hissed," Seat yourself on that rug right now!"

Damian glared at her. His blue eyes practically screaming that he would and knows how to kill. Yet Miss. Everlou could not believe such a young, sweet, innocent child could ever have the will or capacity to do such a monstrous act. Damian on the other hand was already plotting his teacher's death. He needed to out smart the Batfamily so he wouldn't get in trouble for it. Not that he cared. He just didn't want all 10,923 of his weapons to be taken away from him.

After a few minutes he sat down on the rug surprising not only the teacher but also the entire class who had looked on to his and Miss. Everlou's argument. He sat a little away from the rest of the class much to Miss. Everlou's disappointment.

For the rest of the day Damian had sat quietly throw a read aloud, drew pictures (his was of cats and weapons mostly), learned some stuff he already knew, and finally it was lunchtime. He could have been the luckiest boy in the whole world at that moment. For he leaned sat with her class at lunch. He sat right next to her chair on the left side. He opened his lunch box to lobster (which was warm due to Alfred's butler magic), a small salad, and crème brulee. He noted his teacher and really everyone around him looked at him with wide surprised eyes.

" Quit looking at me." Damian growled and left the unsaid or I'll kill you notable.

" Manners Damian." Miss. Everlou urged nonchalantly.

Damian gave her a glare that melted into a very believable fake smile. Miss. Everlou knew better though. She knew that trusting Damian was probably a big mistake. She smiled back at Damian for the time being though.

continued...

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**Well hope you liked the story. This was for a ELA assignment for a short story and so heres the first part of it. I'm not sure if what I'm with it too much though. And please review because thats what lets me know this story isn't just skimed through its actully being enjoyed by some people. **


	4. Cupcakes

**Well here's chapter three. Please enjoy! And review.**

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**The First's Story**

He saw his parents fall, the rope snap. A sure mistake right? So why to young Dick Greyson have the distinct feeling that it wasn't? His feelings were confirmed when he met The Dark Knight himself. It was a few minutes after his parents had died. The Batman had just walked up to him and asked a few questions concerning his parent's death. Dick answered them to the best of his ability. He just felt so numb. He had already cried, but he still had more to come. The Batman had left the kid as quick as he came.

The next day went slow for Dick. He had stayed up crying all night and now had no tears left. He refused to eat worrying his circus family. It was a miracle that Billionaire Bruce Wayne had adopted the boy. Especially sense Dick was a bit old for what age people wanted to adopt a child. Dick had packed his bag, which wasn't much because he did live on a traveling circus. He hoped into the limo.

" Hello Richard." came the friendly voice Bruce Wayne.

To a young kid being in the presence of a person who holds such a big company can be very intimidating. Dick felt this at first, but as he engaged more in conversation with the Billionaire he felt more comfortable. They pulled into the driveway of Wayne Mansion. Dick stared at it in awe when the butler let him out. He could hardly believe he was going to live in such a massive place.

" Nice place huh?"

Dick could only manage to nod. He heard Bruce chuckle behind him. After Dick was shown to his room he unpacked and went exploring throughout the house. A particular grandfather clock caught his attention. Something about it felt out of place, strange, mysterious almost. Yet it was such a casual thing probably in the homes of the wealthy. He was about to touch it when he heard Alfred from behind him," Master Richard I trust you have made yourself acquainted with the Wayne Mansion."

" I prefer Dick over Richard sir. And yes I have." he said looking down at the ground. He got the impression Alfred didn't like him too much.

Alfred asked him to wash up because dinner was almost ready. As Dick made his way tords the bathroom he decided that later tonight he'd check out the grandfather clock when everyone else was asleep.

**Birthdays**

Bruce was supposed to go to Clark's birthday party. _Everyone_ from the JL was going to be there. I was supposed to go last year, but he came up with a really good excuse. But this time was different. This time Clark himself came to get him. Bruce nearly died when the kriptonian said he was there to take him.

" I um I-Dick has baseball practice."

" Bruce Dick's in collage and he never played any sports." Clark gave him a suspicious look.

Bruce sighed and tried to come up with an even better lie.

" Damian and I are doing some father son bonding."

" Oh." Clark said disappointed.

" Yup. Well you should head over to your party." Bruce was practically pushing him out the door.

" Well guess there's always next year huh?"

Superman began to fly away.

" Wait!"

" What?!"

" I just remembered Damian was staying at a friends house!"

Superman had the biggest smile grow on his face.

**Imagine**

Jason never thought he would be resurrected. He  
never thought he would come to hate Batman. He never thought he would be slowly  
going mentally insane. Or that he would wish he could just die. He never  
imagined he would be asking Bruce to take his life. Or the disappointment on  
his face when Bruce had said no.

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**Well hope you enjoyed. And if there are any other Batfamily characters you want me to do then please say so because I honestly don't know that many and I love discovering new characters to things I like. Also I only know all the Robin's, Barbra, Stephenie, and Bruce.**


	5. Ice Cream

**THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS! They made me soooo happy.**

**Dick: Sure did**

**Jason: So enjoy this chapter**

**Tim: And review more**

**Damian: Or else**

**Dick: Don't threaten the readers!**

**Well you heard em and pleae don't mind Damian. **

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**The Video**

Bruce was fuming. His face was red with both anger and embarrassment as he marched to the third Robin's room.

" Tim!"

No reply.

"TIM!"

" Yes?" came a reply.

" OPEN THE DOOR!"

" I think I'll keep it close cuz I plan on living and all soo yeah…."

" Open. This. Door Up. Know." Bruce said sharply threw clenched teeth.

" No."

Jason saw Bruce's laptop on the coffee table. It was opened to some video. He pushed play and fell down onto the floor laughing. Bruce was in a Sailor Moon outfit and was singing Barbie Girl with a Tuxedo Mask Clark.

**Waffles **

Stephanie loves waffles. Every time that Bruce took his little birdies out for breakfast that she ordered 20 stacks of them. Well this time she had ordered her usual.

" Those are disgusting Steph." Tim commented while cutting a piece of his French toast.

" And this is why we broke up Timmy."

" Hey I just say what I think. And waffles are gross."

"WAFFLES FOREVER!"

**YUeah Thats Right Cake**

Stephanie was on the table and stripping off all her cloths while singing Solo Cup.

" And this why we don't take Stephanie out drinking Jase." Dick said putting his arm around Jason's shoulder.

" Oh shu-that's a pretty big size."

" Ah huh." Dick said looking Steph up and down, " I can see why Tim dated her."

" Womenizer."

" By heart."

Jason rolled his eyes and went to go get Stephanie off the table and dressed.

**Kitties!**

Damian loved cats. So much he grew cat ears and a tail. No joke he hide in his room for a whole day because of it. Lucky for him they went away the next day.

" What are you looking at me for?" Jason has cat ears and a tail in his hands.

**I can do Anything You can do Better**

"I can do anything you can do better. " Jason sang in Dick's ear.

" Shut up."

" Yes I can ,yes I can, yes I can!"

" Seriously! Shut it."

" Ahh come on bro." Jason poked Dick's cheek.

" Why are you poking me?"

" I have no clue."

" Are you…drunk?"

" Why does everyone assume I'm drunk." Jason said annoyed.

" Because 80% of the time you are." Dick pointed out.

" Dick."

" Ye-hey!"

Jason stuck out his tongue.

" I suggest you stick that back in before something…hmm unexpected happens." Dick smirked and walked away.

" Huh? Hey…whats that supposed to mean?" Jason said confused and thinking for once. " Hey!"

" See if you can figure it out!" Dick called after him.

**Confusion**

Jason punched the wall. He didn't understand why he got an irregular heartbeat whenever he was around Dick. It so confusing. His older bro always pissed him off. He hated it when Dick smiled. He hated it when Dick said his name or got so close that he could feel his brother's soft breathing. He hated Dick's eyes, face, body, _everything_ about him really. But most of all he hated how whenever he around Dick he acted so so weird. His face got all red at times. He stared at some parts of his bro. And worst of all he had some weird heart problem. Why was the world so confusingly stupid?

**Grudge**

Bruce had a huge grudge ageist Superman. The Kryptonian was sooo annoying and such a narcissist. Most people don't know this but Bruce helped Luthor to get kryptonite. He also pointed out that Superman was dating Lois Lane. Of course these are just "innocent" misshapes in Clarks life as a hero.

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**Ok so thank you 5-STAR and Batgirl13 for your reviews. And yes as you can see Batgirl13 I did get an idea so thankyou very much for that. Hee hee hee writing is so much fun. Well I guess stay tuned for then next chapter!**


	6. Sherbert

**Well thanks for the review and please review peeps :)**

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**What the Robin's do for Fun**

Dick annoys the hell out of everyone.

Dick: Little Jay give your big bro a hug.

Jason: Get away from me!

Jason pulls pranks

Dick: Jason! Why am I purple?!

Jason's laughing like crazy.

Tim hakes, blackmails, and anything alone those lines really.

Bruce: Tim, why does Cat women porn keep popping up on the batcomputer?

Tim: Who could say.

Damian… -_-lll second thought you don't want to know.

**Batfamily Game Night: Tuesdays**

Bruce: Alfred?

Alfred: Yes master Bruce.

Bruce: Wares Damian?

Alfred: In his room I believe.

Bruce: I already checked there.

Alfred: The Batcave?

Bruce: Checked.

Alfred: Kitchen?

Bruce: Already thought of that.

Alfred: Did you try your room?

Bruce: Why would he be there?

Alfred: Same reason I go into your room.

Bruce: Hot chicks?

Alfred: Hell no! The gaming system.

**Alfred + Past= Don't ask**

When Alfred was young he made many mistakes. One of them was signing up to make condoms so he could get a discount.

Superman: Bruce can I hide in your house for a while?

Bruce: Sure but why?

Superman: My fans have been bugging me lately.

Batman: Out.

Clark: What? But you-

Bruce: Out! Now!

Superman: Yes sir, he flies away.

Tim: The difference between Batman and Superman is all to great.

**Batfamily Game Night: Wednesdays**

Barbara: Go! Fish!

Dick: Wrong game Babs.

Jason: Hasn't anyone ever taught you how to play poker?

Barbara: Who in their right mind would teach the police commissioner's daughter poker?

Jason: Good point.

Damian: Royal flush.

Everyone groans as the youngest beat them again…. for the 20th time.

Dick: Lets play a game where someone other than Damian can win.

Barbara: Agreed!

Damian: How about shots and latters. Or maybe pick up knives?

Dick: What kind of games did the League of Assians teach you?

Damian: All sorts of _fun _games. Why do you ask?

Dick: Why do you play them?

Damian: Because they're fun.

Dick: No they're not! Th-they're dangerous.

Damian: Only if you perceive them to be.

Dick shivers while Damian laughs.

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**Ok well hope enjoyed! And please review! And... cheese?**


	7. Brownies

**Hey sorry I ran out of ideas and well I guess I'll still write the stories just I need a break to think and get so ideas. I guess my insperation just ran dry...sorry. O,O I'm ideas will come soon..er...or later**


	8. Intervention

**Well some insperation came back. I guess lets just hope for more. Also I'm planning on doing a few things on Jason x Tim. They're a cute cuple ...or at least I think so. Also I want three people to review or else I'll stop writing. Well enjoy and hopfuly there will be more to come.**

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Bruce walked into the therapist's office. **All** of his sons were there. Jason leaning ageist the wall flipping threw a mag, Dick in the closest chair to the hot chick physiatrist, Tim sitting in a chair by Dick but closer to Jason, and Damian on the floor with cats.

" What the hell is this?", Bruce demanded.

" An intervention Mr. Wayne", replied the therapist.

" Don't need one.", he growled.

" Bruce we're", Dick glanced at Jason and Tim," _All _worried about your.

Tim rolled his eyes while Jason snorted.

" Sure seems like it.", Bruce muttered as he looked at the door from the corner of his eye.

" Please Mr. Wayne have a seat."

" N-", Dick sprang up and tied him to a chair.

" Now lets get started. First of all I'm Mrs. Chi"

" Hello Mrs. Chi", Bruce said mocking one of those things ware you tell strangers your problem(s).

Mrs. Chi glared at him then the session began.

" Dick why don't you tell Mr. Wayne the problem." Mrs. Chi suggested.

Dick stood up," Well first of all why the hell am I the only Robin who didn't ware pants?"

" Jason didn't ware pants." Bruce stated matter of factly.

" True…"

" Those were shorts!" Jason yelled blushing.

" Sure they were" Dick teased the second Robin.

Jason glared at him.

" Any body else have something to say on the matter?" Mrs. Chi asked.

" Yeah. Why did that _thing_ replace me as Robin? And why do you play favorites? And why the hell did you make Jay Dick ware undies?" Tim asked.

" Well 1. Damian's my son and not some kid I picked up cuz….Well 2. its not my fault I'm bonding with my son. And that is not a question that will be asked again…..**ever**."

All his sons nodded fearing for their lives witch they valued after spending how many years with Bruce.

" Ok next then…um Damian how about you go?" Mrs. Chi said directing everyone's attention to the youngest.

" Can I have another cat? Can you please marry Selina? And why does everyone say you had a relationship with Dick?" Damian said while playing with Mr. Snuggles….the 4th.( Damian doesn't know that yet so shhhh!)

" No, in her dreams, and yes. He was sexy in undies ok." Bruce then stormed out of the room

Everyone was silent.

" Damn it." Dick hissed as he gave a hundred bucks to a smirking Jason.

" Ha! Told you." Jason said smirking more as he dragged Tim with him.

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**I'm serious! You guys better review. I don't care if you already reviewed or not. Reviews make my day.**


	9. Pancakes

**Well summer at last. Ah sweet swet freedom from the evil clutches os school. So please enjoy the story and review! :) PS: As not obvious as it is I don't own Batman or the characters. If I did there'd be lots of slash.**

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**Cupcakes**

Dick was eating a cupcake, which he stole from Jason's stash, and looking at photos from back in the day. He had to admit those were some great times. He made lame jokes and had to ware underwear. He remembered how much he hated warring those undies. And how Bruce…. he shivered before past memories he tried to burry deep came surfacing up.

That's when Jason came in. He was fuming and smacked the cupcake from Dick's hand.

" DON'T EAT MY CUPCAKES!" He yelled.

" Hey I don't a see name on these." Dick defended.

Jason sighed and flopped down on the couch next to Dick.

" Rough day?" Dick asked.

" You have no clue." Jason gave him a wry smile.

Dick nodded in understanding. Then he showed Jason a picture of them together with Bruce and Babs. It was taken on a sunny day. Babs wasn't wheelchair bound then. Jason was also Robin then. He had a smile bigger than any child's on Christmas morning.

Jason looked at the picture for a moment. He face lightened up.

" Don't expect me to get all sentimental. " Jason said.

" So you're already accusing me of such things?" Dick teased.

Jason gave him a look that said are you serious?

**Life**

Barbara was having a rough day. For starters her hair decided to puff up so she had an afro, her homework was on fire (which she has no clue how that even happened), and she had a date in less that two hours. Barbara wiped a tear from her face. Life really sucked sometimes. She sighed and yelled for Alfred. The butler was a miracle worker.

" Goodness me!" Alfred stared in horror and got right to work.

At the end of and hour in a half her hair was perfect. She put on a red dress, a necklace, and was just in time for her date to pick her up. Life really was blessing.

**Attention Hog**

Damian hated not having attention. Especially from Dick. So the current Robin decided to hang around Jason. The second Robin was wry at first of Damian's sudden interest to hang around him instead of Dick, but soon grew used to it.

" So Dick drop you for a cuter little bro." Jason joked.

" Why would I care if he?" Damian glared at his older bro.

" Ok , ok don't go killing people with your glares. Sheesh I was just kidding." Jason said putting his hands up mockingly.

Damian rolled his eyes, " I wana play a game."

" Hmm?" Jason said teasingly as he went back to looking for replacement helmets. The red sock just wasn't working anymore.

" Its called I have something you _need_ so take me out to get icecream."

Jason gave Damian the most serious look he had ever given in his life," Damian if that's all you want then so be it."

" Really? All I had to do to get ice cream was give you your helmet back?

" Pretty much." Jason said as he got up and rushed Damian into the car.

**WEEEEEEEEEEEEE**

-A message from the Batfamily-

Bruce: Well as some of you know

Jason: ITS FING SUMMER VACATION!

Bruce: And we'd like to-

Dick: Jason! Stop touching Tim!

Bruce: Say that-

Tim: I will kick into next week Jay!

Bruce: We are all happy-

Damian: Wares my kitty Drake?

Tim: Don't blame your missing cat on me!

Bruce: Oh to hell with it! WE'RE GOING TO TOUR EROPE SO IN YOUR FACE SUCKERS!

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**Well please review. Also expect a bunch of randomness in latter chapters! Also I'm debating with myself which is a cuter pairing Jason x Tim or Dick x Jason. And why don't people ship Tim x Damian more? **


	10. To the Airport

**Well the vacation begins. Please enjoy the story :)**

Suitcases shuffled through out the Wayne Manor. The current three wards, yes Alfred was indeed going, were now loading the car. First thing was first; they had to pick up the other family members from their various locations. Getting into the car they drove off at 1:30 am on a peaceful Friday morning.

Bruce watched his son drift back to sleep in the limo. It would only take them 30 minutes until they reached Bludhaven, with the additional extra 15 minutes it took to get to Dick's apartment. He sighed under his breath after realizing this was bound to be a long trip.

Dick was shuffling around. He kept on glancing back to the back of his closet where his Nightwing costume was. They weren't allowed to bring costumes no thanks to Alfred. It was already killing him and it was bound to be driving a certain Daddy Bats insane. Dick finished his packing and downed some cereal before he finally heard the door ring. Dropping his spoon in half finished cereal he rang for the door while swallowing his breakfast. He opened it and saw Alfred, who he handed one of his bags and helped with the other twenty.

After Dick got all his suitcases and bags in the trunk he got inside the limo. He sat on the opposite end of Bruce and Damian. He smiles at Bruce and the sleeping Damian.

" Aw he looks so sweet." Dick whispered with his sweet brotherly voice.

" Yes…. if only he didn't want to kill his brother."

" I'm sure it's just a phase." Dick reassures his adoptive father.

" Yeah." Bruce said.

" So what's the next stop?" Dick asks.

Bruce lets out a low stressed sigh, " Jason."

" Oh." Dick said nonchalantly.

Bruce quirks a brow, but doesn't say anything after that.

Jason glared as he looked up to see Alfred, Dick, and Bruce above him. All three had the 'you forgot look'. Jason's confused face confirmed their suspensions.

Bruce sighed," You do realize the trip is _today_ right?"

" Ah shit!" He so had forgotten completely. It was probably the head wound…or was it just fantasizing about Tim for two hours straight. Nah it was the head wound.

" Um I should probably start to pack…"

" Yes get to that. You have five minutes before we meet Tim and the girls." Bruce said just for the purpose of informing him that Tim wasn't riding with them in the car, much to his dismay.

Jason let out a puff of air before getting up and rushing to pack clothes, a toothbrush, and what ever weapons that he could manage past airline security. He also managed to pack his mask without Alfred noticing, though to say it escaped Bruce's sight would be an incorrect statement.

Slinging his backpack over his shoulder Jason headed out to the limo with his 'family' ((family ….we all know how you really feel inside Jay)) in toe.

Jason took a seat next to Dick and the car fell silent as probably the only person who would have caused an instant ruckus fell back asleep.

So leaving the guys to their peaceful drive lets take a look at the girls of the family

Stephanie munched on one of Helena's granola bars. It was a chocolate chip one. Cassandra was next to her as Kate drove off to get Tim. They had already picked up every girl. He had assured them he could get to the airport on his own, but Stephanie insisted. As they entered the Titans Tower Steph could see Tim already getting ready to pop his bags in the trunk and get going.

" On time as always." Stephanie remarked under breath.

Tim put his stuff in the trunk and got into the back of the car.

" Hey." He greeted the girls.

" Hi Timmy." Stephanie teased and messed with her brother's hair.

Tim laughed and swatted at her hands. " Hey, come on Steph."

" Now Timmsy let your sister mess with hair." Steph said while she continued to mess with it.

Tim rolled his eyes and stopped swatting. Cassandra looked at the two curiously. She new they once had dated, but then things got complicated and broke up. Somehow they became like brother and sister over the years. Perhaps it had something to do with their previous relationship.

Kate drove on and on and on. That was until they got a phone call.

Steph was the one to answer it, " Hello?"

" Steph? I-its Dick. Can you guys get here ASAP? Oh, oh god. I think I'm hurl!" The phone then went to a background noise of oh my god, what the hell, and Dick hurling.

" Hey, what's going on? Guys? Guys!" That earned Steph some weird and worried looks.

" Are they-" Barbara began calmly.

" I don't know." Steph said already feeling her stomach churn.

" Babs get out your lab top and trace the call." Tim ordered as Kate stopped the car at a near by gas station.

Babs traced the car's location to three miles out of Gothem.

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**Yeah not so much funny as it is informative. Sorry 'bout that. Anywho tune in whenever I update next to find out how the hell Bruce got to be three miles out of Gothem City. Well see you next time kids. Also review for its like my pot of chacolate gold at the end of every rainbow. :)**


	11. Cookies

**Wow its been a while. Well please enjoy while I die from too much homework already. Its only the third week of school T_T.**

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**The Batfamily Vacation pt.2**

So about an hour before the call….

" Hey Alfred wana bet on who will survive this trip?" Dick asked cheerfully.

" Of coarse. Fifty on Bruce."

" Ah I vote… Tim."

" Horrible choice Greyson."

" GAH!" Dick screamed at the top of his lungs scared half to death.

Damian wiped his eyes tiredly and cased Dick a menacing glare. It was too early for your twenty something year old brother to be screaming like a little girl.

" WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR DICK!" Screamed Jason. Who had been asleep until Dick screamed in his ear.

" Sorry. Damian scared my half to death." Dick put his hands up apologetically.

" Well fuck him too." Jason grumbled.

Alfred had managed to drive smoothly even through that ruckus, but the world was ageist them that day. For a drunk Clark Kent in a Princess Tutu costume jumped in front of the limo screaming, " HE'S MY BEST, BEST OF ALL BEST FRIENDS YOU SHOULD GET A BEST FRIEND TOO…"

" WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!" Alfred screamed before he swiveled the limo out of control and the car turned for three miles straight. All guys were screaming on the top of their lungs. Luckily Alfred managed to push the breaks. They all flew out of the car to puck.

" Oh god oh god oh god!" Dick yelled and then hurled his Life out.

" I, puck, never want to, puck, go on vacation with you ass, puck, holes ever again." Jason said between pucks.

Dick had called the girls but ended up having to hang up and puck more.

" Clark…..IS GOING TO DIE FOR THIS!" Bruce yelled.

" Heh heh heh fifty bucks Alfred." Dick smirked.

And so after that the Batfamily missed their flight and had to go home. They all decided it was best to just hang around Gothem for a summer.

**Damian's Many Question's pt.1**

Damian: Father?

Bruce: Yes?

Damian: I was watching the discovery channel when it said that milk can come from a women's breast.

Bruce: And?

Damian: A re women part cow?

Bruce face palms: No, women are not part cow.

Damian: Why not?  
They are both mammals. It makes perfect sense.

Bruce: Then why did you ask me?

Damian: Because I'm Batman.

Bruce: I'm going to have to have a talk with your mother.

**Damian's many question's pt.2**

Damian: Mother?

Talia: Yes my son?

Damian: I was watching the discovery channel when it said that men have a tactical. So am I part octopus or squid?

Talia: Um… you are neither.

Damian: That is not what I asked mother. And I thought I could at least use you for information, but now it seems you are just a lost cause in my life and have already for filled your purpose, he goes back to Gothem.

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**Well hope you enjoyed and please review! *Puppy dog eyes* Review!**


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